I just looked up my calendar to see how long it’s been since my buddy and I have been having accountability calls together. January 2017! Wowsers.
I knew it had been a while, but that just feels really significant.
That’s meant that for over two years we’ve caught up almost weekly (we’re actually pretty consistent here minus things like school holidays).
While I say it’s about accountability, really it’s about so much more. It’s been about having someone in my life who’s up to date on my business (and life) ventures.
Sometimes in minute detail and at other times just the headlines that are clear indicators of things like where my mindset is at.
I used to tell myself this story that I wasn’t much of a ‘finisher’ or didn’t really ‘follow through’. But I’ve been realising how untrue this is.
As a high-achiever I think I’d have these exceptionally high standards about what it meant to follow through and finish something… I had to follow every exacting step in order to say “yep I’m done now”.
Instead of appreciating what I’d already gained simply by moving through to whatever point I was at.
And while there’s huge benefits in yes, actually following through and finishing things, I think there’s so much more value in noticing when you’re done – and what feels right for you.
I’ve been reading a book by Denise Duffield Thomas called ‘Chillpreneur’ that talks about the value of knowing when to let things go and not take on so much in our lives. While its written for women who run their own businesses, this advice is just so relevant for everyone.
There’s this one paragraph I underlined (and even talked about it on Instagram) because it really hones in on this exact point.
I felt such relief reading it.
It essentially said “It’s okay to change your mind”.
I think we get stuck when we think it’s not okay to change our mind.
We think there’s a certain way things have to be in order for us to say we’ve “done it” or we’ve accomplished something, or it’s okay to “finish” now.
Yet what that ends up meaning is that we push push push and just feel – exhausted. Done. Flat. Unfired up about our lives.
And we should feel fired up. Excited. And energised. That’s what life is all about – feeling good!
So when I realised how long my buddy and I have been catching up for it made me feel pretty good about myself. ?
Not because I’ve “followed through” but because I realised there’s been no pressure, no exceptionally high standard, or ridiculous self-talk about “I must do this thing”.
Instead it’s been simply an integration into my life. My weekly call. It’s just what I do.
I think our lives work way better when we run them like this.
When what we need, the support, the love, the flow is integrated into the fabric of our lives instead of patched on.
My calls work because I value what they give me. And some weeks I honestly barely tell her much at all. Some weeks I don’t even mention the business. Other weeks we even dive in deep to emotional stuff.
What it does give me though is the realisation that I really do follow through when it matters to me. And, that it really is okay to stop something that’s not working.
Where in your life are you pushing to finish something, when really you could just let it go? I’d love to hear. Send me an email and let me know.
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