I bought myself another candle. This time it was not on the sale rack. (I wrote a blog about this a few months ago).
I’ve just sat down at my desk, after wiping all my surfaces down with a mixture of rosemary and lemongrass scents.
I’ve lit my rose and bergamot candle and it’s happily shining its light towards me, like a steady companion as I type away. There’s a soft glare coming through my window that feels like sunshine. It’s lighting up the room. And I feel calm. Loved. Comfortable.
The moment I opened the lid to my candle I felt this overwhelming sensation of calm company.
And, my candle came with a note.
A loving and generous note with three simple words: “We miss you.”
For the most part, during the stay-home restrictions I have felt more cocooned than “trapped”. I’ve felt steady and sure that I can keep showing up as myself, keep on with my new rhythm. I’ve enjoyed the sanctuary.
And, as with any human experience, I’ve also had my moments of toppling. Of unpinning. Tears without reason. Frustrations out of the blue. Days of wondering who am I? What was I doing? Where’s that energy gone?
That is, after all, the very rhythm of life. Ebbs and flows.
When I opened my delivery, with that beautiful note resting neatly on top of the packaging keeping my candle safe – I felt this surge of emotion. Of connection. A mixture of immense gratitude, love and yearning.
The restrictions are naturally bringing to the surface what we may previously have batted away. Confrontations we were avoiding. Acknowledgements of where we have been placing our priorities in our lives. And spotlighting areas that we absolutely love and want more of.
Some things in my life were easily and readily let go of.
Some stayed the same.
And others, there’s been a clear deep yearning feeling – an acknowledgement of how much they mean to me.
The note was from a very special community in my life (who just so happen to also sell candles). And those three words, or more accurately the feeling they invoked, were a clear signal of where to place my time and energy.
A reminder of how much it means to me. Of what they give me. Of why I would (and do) prioritise them in my life.
A crystalisation for me of where I feel at home, versus where I’m chasing to be.
Usually at this time of year I do a mid-year review. It’s one of my favourite things to do! A mini stocktake of how things are going so far and reignition of what I most want to create in my life.
So often we’re busy chasing that we forget to integrate.
While I’ll most definitely still be doing the review, it feels like this year I need a few more weeks to marinate. To let even more bubble to the surface. What matters most? What’s working? What’s not?
I’ll be paying even closer attention to the feelings invoked when I answer those questions for myself. (Like the ones I felt the moment I read those three words).
I’m not sure if I’m ready to fully emerge from my cocoon yet. I do know when I am, I’ll be clearer than ever before of where I most want my time and energy to go.
Communities, places, people, conversations, solitude, moments that invoke deep gratitude, love and yearning. That’s where they’ll be going.
Where will you be when you emerge?
When I’m ready to go through the steps in my mid-year-review process, would you like to join me?
I’m considering running a masterclass to take you through the exact steps I do to integrate more joy and bring my visions to life.
This topic of “reviews and planning” is by far one of the most popular I talk about (the podcast episode I did at the end of 2019 on year-end reviews is my most downloaded episode).
If you want the guidance to do this for yourself, reply to this email saying YES. I’ll know what it means and you’ll be the first to know when the masterclass is ready.
With that, whatever you’re up to today, may it be joyful for you.
P.S. Needless to say there is a lot going on right now globally. I’m digging deeper for my own internal processing of the antiracial movement and stand wholeheartedly with it. I’m being “quiet” right now, so I can listen. So I can hear. So I can learn. Please don’t mistake that for silence. And if you want to know more read this post.
P.P.S. If you’re looking for a safe place to process some of your own big emotions right now, and recalibrate, my monthly Joy Club membership is open for registration and the introductory rate of £9 per month is still valid. Click here to find out more.