When Change Is Hard And You Discover You Need To Stand Up For Yourself

I left a voicenote for a friend earlier this week. I was raving about a book I’ve just read and telling her all the intricate details. I didn’t hold back. I was full of passion. And then told her to go get the book. And watch the interview.

I used to hold back. I used to think all the crazy things I read and listened to were not what other people wanted to hear about.

They would find it too “positive” or they’d make fun of me for being all “gung ho” about things. Or… I don’t really know what I thought?

There’s something odd that happens when we start making changes in our lives, and it may just catch you by surprise—you change.

Not in a trying-to-be-someone-else kinda way, but in a real deep truthful way. The way that every time you tap more and more into that change, you feel like you’re coming alive.

That can feel a little isolating at first. Because, it’s different.

Different to how you’re used to being, but also because it’s different to how others are used to you showing up.

For me – I want to come alive more.

I want to rave about a book I just read and the impact it’s having on my life and then talk to someone about it! But, I want them to come alive too.

There’s “places” I go to feel a certain way. Like I go to the river to feel calm. The coffee shop to feel creative and grounded. The yoga studio to feel centred (even the virtual studio). And, there’s “places” I go to share my growth journey too.

I’ve been building my community around me, people I can check in with and know for sure I’ll come alive afterwards.

In the early days I didn’t really know how to “show up” and where to “go”, so sometimes it’d be like I had my feet trodden on. Or the fire in my heart was put out.

The stage of change that I was at was still tender. It needed a little more care and nurturing.

My growth was new. Like a seedling it needed to be tended to softly and gently as its root structure settled in.

You’ve probably felt a bit awkward at times talking about the kind of change you want to make in your life. You’re not sure where to go or who to talk to. When you’ve tried you might not have got the answers you were really looking for.

Trust yourself.

Those nudges you get on the inside when someone reacts in a certain way – they tell you if your seedling is too fresh to share, or if it’s just not hanging out in the right “garden”.

Take your time. Listen to yourself. You’ll start to notice the spaces and places where your change matters most.

Most of all, your growth will unfold only when you’re ready to stand up for it. Ready to keep going. I didn’t hold back leaving that voicenote for my friend. But I also wasn’t worried about what she would think of me.

I knew what I liked and I wanted to share it. If she’d responded telling me she didn’t like it – it wouldn’t have mattered. Because that wasn’t the point.

The point was that I was showing up fully for me in that moment.

Go show up fully for yourself this week. It’s the only way to actually get what you really want in your life.